Tuesday, September 27, 2011

Striving for Perfection.

  As a good human being, I have always wanted to find ways to be better.  As I have grown older and life has become more complicated, I don't even know what better is.  I know that looking back over the years, I am definately not better.  My constant focus on making sure everyone around me is okay and that I am not overburdening my friendships has left me tired.  I have always tried to be better since the first day I learned that I am a sinner, and God wants me to do better.  I know what I have become is the result of human efforts to acheive what only God can, but the habits are hard to break, and the way I think of myself is almost impossible to fight.  Yes, I can pray about it, but what then?  I have serious anxiety about failing in even the smallest way, and it triggers some of the most embarrassing coping mechanisms. 
  Today, I started my spiral because I WANTED to eat a cupcake.  Yeah, I didn't eat one, but the fact that it was there made me mad, and I shouldn't be mad - perfect people don't get mad, and so on.  So, I ate some dark chocolate instead, but oh no, that was a slip as well.  No substitutions, bad food is bad food, and hate yourself for eating that garbage.  Then, the unhealthy desire to just hate myself and proceed with a full on binge starts to tickle my brain, and at the same time, I want to hit the restroom and vomit.  I am fighting it now, knowing that I should just forgive myself for eating chocolate and move on.  I hate myself for being a failure.  I have failed in such a minor thing, but my mind makes it so large and important.   I can't seem to use reason to argue with it. 
  I know that having an eating disorder is not so rare.  I know that there are a lot of emotional issues associated with it, and that I can find healthy ways to address these problems, but I am ashamed that this is even a problem.  I am a grown-up not some emotional teenager with hormonal issues.  But here I am, examining myself, hating myself, and hating that I hate myself.  The day started well.  I messed up and couldn't ride my bike to work because I lost my bike lock.  I adapted my plans, and decided I could just do my swimming instead.  Oh, happy day.  But, I didn't really let it go.  I am mad at myself for being disorganized and for losing my lock and ruining my plans.  I thought I did okay, but I am trapped in this way of thinking, and even when I think I get past it, I don't.  My brain feels cluttered with a mess of emotions that I don't understand and don't want to have.  I wish I could push it all back down, and ignore it, but I am pretty sure that's what got me in trouble in the first place. 

I hate myself today because:
-I see myself as disorganized
-I ate candy I shouldn't have
-I drank diet dr. pepper
-I didn't bike to work
-I look ugly
-I am emotionally unhealthy
-I have to sleep to much
-I don't sleep very well
-I didn't make food my husband liked

And there we are.  I don't know what that tells me.  Something like, I'm a crazy person, but that is just somehting I'm coming to understand about myself.  I suck at being happy.

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